WWE Wrestler Has Backstage Heat Simply For Existing

Midcard wrestler Daryl “Smash Jackson” Sorensen has reportedly landed himself in the doghouse, apparently just for being there.  He has spent weeks doing jobs on Superstars and had been forced to change in the hallway outside the locker room for the last several weeks in what appears to be a heretofore unseen violation of the ambiguous rules of backstage conduct.

<!–more–>”I’ve seen people get in trouble for some weird crap during the time I’ve been here,” said one worker who requested anonymity so he wouldn’t have to toss Vince McMahon’s salad on Raw as punishment, “Leaving early, not shaking everyone’s hand, shaking everyone’s hand, not beating up Batista for screwing their girlfriend, but this is the first time I’ve seen anyone get in this much trouble just for being there.  It’s insane.”

Another worker who also requested anonymity had a different take on the situation: “The guy’s a genius. He just got here, and already found a way to collect a six figure salary for doing practically nothing.  He’s not taking many bumps, gets to eat at catering, and it’ll probably be like seven years before they even remember he’s under contract and release him.  I wish I’d thought of it.”

Atlas Security Hired To Keep Order On Pier Six

A new sheriff is coming to a place long renowned for being home to many of the most vicious brawls known to man, as Atlas Security has been hired to police the lawless badlands of Pier Six. After years of maintaining order at wrestling shows promoted by companies like ECW and TNA, Atlas Security is well prepared for the types of troublemakers they’ll be faced with on Pier Six.

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Dixie Carter In Apparent Stupor

According to those close to her, TNA President Dixie Carter has lapsed into an unusual stupor where the only words she speaks are “Stay tuned!” While this has long been one of her favorite responses to questions she didn’t have ready answers for, Dixie has apparently become trapped in a psychological rut that has experts baffled. Read more

Heel Interference Foiled When Babyface Not Distracted By Entrance Music

Bray Wyatt recently suffered an unexpected loss to Dean Ambrose on Monday Night Raw when, despite Seth Rollins’ music playing during the match as Rollins made his way to the ring, Ambrose kept wrestling and defeated Wyatt before Rollins even got close to the ring.

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GFW Announces TV Deal On TV55 In New York

Hot on the heels of TNA’s announcement of their new deal with Destination America, TNA founder Jeff Jarrett has finally, after nearly a year of speculation, announced a TV deal for his fledgling GFW promotion. Starting in Janaury, they will air at 1 am on TV 55 in New York City, with the possibility of other overnight programming based on GFW’s ratings performance.

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